Little ray of sunshine: my son …

My name is Milena. I am 24 years old. I was born and grew up in one of the villages of Kotayq region. The village was everything to me; my home, my parents, my brothers, my relatives and friends. The village was my entire life full of vivid memories, happiness and light. I was one of the most beloved and respected children in our village. I have been a very active and happy child who reached out to everyone, helped people in need and supported the weak.

It may seem that I had everything to feel happy except the fact that I lost my father at a very young age and my mother did everything in her power to eliminate that gap in my life.

I graduated the school with honors, and then went to a medical college, where I was also very successful. After the graduation I started working as an intern in one of the hospitals in Yerevan and soon found a job of the profession I loved so much.  I was happy thinking I achieved all my goals and came far in my life and I did it all on my own.

I also managed to enjoy the respect and love of my colleagues until the day when my whole life turned upside down. It was one of my working days. I walked into the hospital room and saw a young man lying there. He was very sick and was undergoing treatment in our hospital. We met, fell in love and continued seeing each other after he checked out. Everything seemed to be going well and smooth, I was in love and in the seventh heaven.

 But when he learnt about my pregnancy, everything grew dark around me. I hid my pregnancy from everyone. Only my close friend and he knew about that. He was shocked and panicked by the news and his first reaction was to get rid of my pregnancy. My friend tried to convince me of the same. In the final month of the pregnancy when my mother found out about it, she advised to abandon the baby taking into account the stereotypes, rituals and traditions prevalent in the Armenian reality.

Everyone was trying to persuade me to either get rid of the pregnancy, or to send the baby to an orphanage or a family without children.

But my story differs from other people’s stories in that I never wanted to leave my baby, no matter how much my mind was thinking about that, my heart told me something completely different.  I was fighting for him in every possible way, but it was a hard fight, as I was all alone and didn’t know what to do. Because of that decision I lost everything; my carefree years, dear brothers who couldn’t forgive my deed, my mother, who couldn’t have any contact with me, and finally, my native home-the warmest corner in the world.   

But as they say there is always a light at the end of the tunnel. And that light was ”Bari Mama” organization that helped me by providing a temporary shelter as well as huge material and phycological support. My son without whom I could never imagine my life is with me now .

I feel protected and cared for. I live at Bari Tnak, work, learn and help the people there with everything I can. ”Bari Mama” is not just a structure. It’s more than a regular geometric pattern made of ordinary stones. It’s the love giving life, the warmth filling the lack of your mother’s warmth, the hope pushing you forward and making you stand up, and finally, it’s the belief that not everything is lost and the best is yet to come.

”Bari Mama” is me and my son – the softest and the sweetest baby ever, who is precious above all and everything.